Space-Time Continuum

Do you think that if you COULD go back in time and get the chance to have a re-do on one particular thing, that would alter everything? By changing one tiny little thing, everything would be changed? Well the theory of space-time continuum certainly thinks so!

All it takes is one distant memory of a decision that you have made. Think about it and the repercussions of said decision.

Example: When I decided to stay with Bevels when they moved and expanded. I wouldn't of had such a crazy, demanding schedule forcing me to miss my Saturday for my circuit assembly. Which then allowed me to go to another one where I ran into Whitney in the bathroom after a few years going by since we last saw each other. From there Whitney became one of the closest people in my life. Then, she decided to move to New York. Where then she eventually moved in with Tassie, and the two of them planned a trip away for three months, allowing Debi and I to sublet from them. Moving me officially to New York.

Wowza!

Just think, if I didn't go to another circuit assembly, would I of still ran into Whitney? Would I of still moved to New York? What are the odds that I would have moved into the same building as Kia? Or even met Debi? Would I of ever ran into Ian and Christina? Would I still have spent basically the entire summer and Ai and Maurice's? How would I have encountered the Vivianos? If we never knew each other in Michigan, what is the probability in New York? If I never met Tassie, where would I be living right now?

If I would have changed my direction of one Saturday, what would my life be like right now?

Birthday Suits and Hair Removal

So last night my roommate witnessed a full on nude lady walking the streets of Brooklyn. Butt naked! Well, completely naked except for the shoes she had on. Heels to be exact. She was seen walking across the intersection of Smith and Bergen, arm in arm with a fully clothed woman. And for whatever reason, I am so intrigued by this. I had so many questions that I desperately seem to need answers too. Who was this woman? Why was she naked? Where was she coming from? Where was she going? Who was the fully clothed lady? Was she crazy? What did her hair look like? Was she wearing jewelry? Did she have makeup on? To my despair, my roommate gave the "I don't know" answer to most of these questions. COME ON!!! You can't drop a bomb that you may or may not have had a run in with a nudist in New York City and not have any more details for me! Or at least elaborate and lie to me just for the heck of it! So for all my friends that I know want all the juicy facts, so we can later conspire as to what actually took place on a Wednesday evening, here they are:

There was a lady, in her 30's, dressed nicely, average prettiness, walking arm in arm with a lady in her 40's, who was naked in heels. The said nude person acted as if not a single thing was out of the ordinary. She was not talking loud, or drawing any more unnecessary attention to herself. She seemed unbelievably normal, besides the fact that she was wearing her birthday suit out and about. She was neither overly skinny, or fat by any means. My roommate caught the backside of her and said she looked pretty good considering her age. And for reasons I'm not even too sure of, this mysterious naked woman instantly became my idol! I mean, how can you not cheer for some naked 40ish year old woman walking the streets like she straight owns them! The confidence on her! Bravo, naked lady, BRAVO! I fear I maybe have one or two (maybe) more dimples on this backside of mine than what would merit a body deserving of showing off to to the Big Apple.

And this is just a side bar, but does anyone else get extremely angry or find it hysterical when you are getting your eyebrows done (either waxing or threading) and then they ask if you want your upper lip done too? What are you implying here? Are you saying that my upper lip is somewhat resembling that of a hipster wannabe? Wha?!?! Sometimes that comment ruins my day and other times it makes my day. But mostly I want to shout HECK NO you are not going to thread my peach fuzz!!!! I would rather have nails driven under my nail beds. A part of me thinks that my new naked idol friend would sit her cheeks in that chair and take it like a champ that she is......

The Insufferable Child on the 4th Floor!

4J is PUSHING their luck! BIG TIME! Riddle me this: what kind of idiots who birth an obnoxiously loud spawn that does not have any other type of movement octave besides stomping, decide to rent an apartment on any floor above ground level? What kind of evil master minds do that??!? This little 3-4 year old beast that lives right above me does NOTHING but run and stomp from one end of the apartment, to the other, all the live long day! So there is no escaping it. If I am home and he is home, there is no where that I can go to get away from the psychotic tyrant that inhabits the space above me!

And seriously parents, what is the matter with you? Growing up we were never, let me repeat for emphasis, NEVER allowed to run in the house. And we didn't even have downstairs neighbors! Running in the house was not gonna fly with Sue Kula, uh-uh, no way! That, and slamming doors, and if she called you, you were not just supposed to shout "what?", you needed to go and see what she wanted. The parents living upstairs apparently have no concept of respect, kindness, or even proper apartment living etiquette'! Shame on them for not knowing or caring! By the sound of it, you are hoping to rear your child to become a dictator of some sort, judging by the way you excuse (encourage?) the stomps coming out of little feet. That brings up another point, he is such a small child, how is it physically possible for so much noise to be coming from something so small??

And somehow my roomie is completely un-phased by all the hub-bub upstairs. I don't know how that is even possible, maybe she is a robot. Great, so I have a stomping monster upstairs, and a mechanically engineered "thing" living with me. But anyways, my robot roomie says that it would be rude or "unnecessary" for me to be the little old lady that I desperately want to be and take out a stick and bang the daylights (ha!) out of my ceiling aka-their floor to let them know that I have HAD IT! And to knock it off! Rude? Really? THAT would be rude? Not the fact that their child's refusal to walk lightly like a normal human isn't rude? Me no compute that. I feel like a gentle reminder that there is a freakin' park right across the street, where homeboy can run his little heart out, is a nice, neighborly thing to do. You know how there is the Better Business Bureau, to keep businesses in check when they start thinking they do no wrong? I feel like initiating a Better Upstairs Neighbor Bureau, that can come in and shut them down when they be acting like straight fools! That seems like a lot of work. Is getting a law passed that occupants with children are only allowed to live in bottom floor apartments for the happiness and well-being of all, any easier? Or maybe I could somehow kindly let myself into the place when they are not home, this is not considered "breaking in" if it's for the right reason-I have that on good authority, and somehow lay down sound reducing padding across their entire apartment! Because folks, all Amanda wants to hear is the pidder padder of little feet, not the stomps of a T-Rex man baby monstrosity! Kula OUT!

It's 10 O'Clock, Do You Know Where Your Roommate Is?

I must confess, I am slightly worried. It is precisely 10:12 pm on a Tuesday night, and my roommate is no where to be found! So strange! Considering that around this same time last night she was sound asleep. I know this because I too may have been passed out hard close around that time as well. (No need for judgement. I love my sleep thank you very much. And am unbelievably proud that I strive to get the suggested amount of 8+ hours a night. Don't be jealous!)

I mean what could she possibly be doing? And why am I slightly jealous? I have this unsettling need to go out as well. Be a woman about town at 10:30 on a Tuesday night. I can see myself now, walking around this great city, totaling throwing caution to the wind about having an early morning tomorrow! I could be wild too! Oh! Is that how it's gonna be roommate? Are you trying to one up me??!!? You think your so cool cause you have plans on a week night? Your SO awesome cause you don't immediately start yawning like clock work at 11 pm? Hm! You better thank your LUCKY STARS that I just so happen to be exhausted beyond belief and have no plan to get out of my lovely and comfortable bed. Because if I wasn't, OH! Watch out girl! I can tear up a weekday night like no body's 'BIDNAS!

PS- I also had a thought that you are stranded in the park somewhere, or being chased by a crazy person, or stuck in an elevator or the train for hours without a bathroom or food. I really hope that is not true. Please don't be dead! Now I really do hope that you are living it up on the rooftop of the Waldorf shaking your tail feather with Vin Diesel or somebody. Please be having fun! But not too much fun, and just know that I could be having fun too on a Tuesday night-Your Have NO Idea!

I Think We Should Go On a Break..

Let me just start out by saying that I love people. I really and truly do. I mean how big of a hypocrite would I be if I, a die hard Barbra Streisand fan, did not live by the mantra of "people who need people, are the luckiest people in the world!"?!?! That would be so very, very uncool of me to sing out those words, but not actually feel them. I want to do good ole Babs justice! Make her proud! People are the bread and butter of life! They make my world go round!

However, (ehem)......I think we need a break from each other. You know I love you, but lately I think our relationship has just turned toxic. More and more of you are becoming unbelievably rude and obnoxious, and so many different levels of annoying it makes my skin crawl. Whatever happened to common courtesy? Taking on more responsibility at work is not helping the situation. Having to talk to attorney after attorney, who are so high up their own butts it is any wonder they even know what fresh air smells like, really makes my day go so deep down into the pits I come out the other end looking and feeling like Eeyore. Listen up jerk wad! You are an idiot! We provide services for YOU, not the other way around. Tell me, is it really that difficult for you to tell me what address you are currently occupying? You don't even have to say that. All you need to say is Yes, or No to the address I just rambled off. You don't give out that type of info? REALLY?!?!?! How do your clients EVER find you, if you never tell anyone your address? You do realize I can just Google you right? What a genius you are to have passed the BAR but can't figured out how to use Google! You sir are a MORON! And I hereby delete you from our client list! Yea, that just happened! What are you gonna do about it? NOTHING, cause I won't give you my address! :P

Living in this city I think is adding to the pressure. I'm starting to feel it's not good to have so many people shoved and on top of each other in such a small square mile. My faith in humanity is very slowly seeping out of me with every backpack that touches me on the train, every person who suddenly stops short on the sidewalk, every person who shouts obscenities down my block at 3 am on a Tuesday night, and the countless rude things that come flying out of people's face flappers all the live long day! I just can't take it anymore. I barely had any patience to begin with, but all this extra crap is stretching that little bit, to it's absolute max! We are running on fumes here people! FUMES!

That is why I am suggesting a break. I know that I do love you, real deep down in my gut, or heart, or butt, or wherever. But right now, I just can't stand the sight of you. I know I want to spend forever with you. But right now, I need you as far away as possible. Just give me a little space to clear my head and to relearn all those reasons why I love you so much. So let's just leave it as a: I'll see you when I see you:)

'Til You Marry Me Bill

I. Am. In. Love.

Plain and simple. There is no escaping or denying it! I have found a person that makes my heart go boom-boom-boom. I suppose you want to know who my betrothed is? Well let's see. He is very creative, he had his own deign company that specialized in hats for a time. He attended Harvard. He has traveled the world. He knows just about every single socialite from Manhattan to Paris, but he could care less. He lives at Carnegie Hall. He is a photographer. His means of transportation is a bicycle. He wears the same blue vest just about everyday. And, he feels uncomfortable when a place is "too luxurious" for him. He is about 85 year old, and his name is Bill Cunningham. Yes, that Bill Cunningham.

Everyone already knows that there is a special little area of my heart that is like butter for super sweet, endearing, lovable older men. But Bill, he takes the cake! He might just be the absolute epitome of joy! And we all know how I could use more of that in my life! He loves capturing moments with his camera. And he is not fooled by copy cats. If he is not impressed, you will know. If he thinks you are fabulous, you will know. He does not care about the guest list before attending events. He will almost get hit by a cab so as to get the shot of the women in the amazing hat! And he will do this all with a big ole smile on his face. And he is unbelievably humble, he is not a sell out. In the movie Bill Cunningham New York you can see how he leads a simple life that is full of happiness. The best line ever was when he said that "I don't know how to work, all I know is how to have fun everyday!" In the movie when he was at Paris for Fashion Week, we see him just patiently waiting off to the side being completely overlooked until someone comes and pulls him in saying, and I quote, "the most important man in the universe" That is my love, the most important man in the universe! But I just loved how he wasn't all angry that he wasn't allowed in, and then NO ONE seemed to recognize him. Nope, not Bill. He just stood there and took what photos he could until he was allowed in. And bonus! He didn't have to sit at the end of the runway like all the other photogs. He got a front row seat baby! Talking right next to Anna Wintour. The best thing about him might be that he knows he is different than most other people, but he blissfully could not care less. Yep, that's my guy, the oddball, weirdo, who is having so much fun doing what he loves! Sorry ladies....he is mine!

I Love The Rain The Most

It is raining in New York City. It has been raining since Tuesday (or possibly Monday night and I was too passed out asleep to notice). To truthfully honest: I do not hate the rain. Sure, it is a pain to try to avoid all the massive puddles everywhere. And trying to juggle holding your bag, the newspaper, an umbrella and a green tea all while trying to talk to your mother on the phone does present some complications. But all things considered, I kinda like the rain. I could see thought how one bad day could turn this into a love/hate relationship, but we will cross that bridge, when and if that day ever comes. I have some favorites that I always want to do on a rainy day, and they are as follows:

• sleep in. sleep all day if that is an option. the rain is the world's most perfect sleep inducing thing. it is nature's lullaby:)
• wear really baggy sweats, including thick chunky socks (think 90's-Alanis Morisette-esque!) and make it a goal to stay inside all day.
• things to do while inside all day-watch One Fine Day, Stepmom, The Godfather Part 2, The Fantastic Mr. Fox, Guys and Dolls, Manhattan Murder Mystery, or a Freak and Geeks marathon.
  
• your rainy day play list should consist of Miles Davis, Edith Piaf, St. Vincent, Jens Lekman, U2, Feist, David Gray, Bright Eyes, and early Dashboard Confessional.
• cook! bake! whatever is it, just create food. I'm think chicken and dumplings, some type of pie, cupcakes, even bread, lovely and glorious, BREAD!
• if you must go out, please wear weather appropriate clothing, not something that will be completely ruined from a single drop of moisture.
  
• places to go to during a rainy day: a bookstore, museums, art galleries, the public library, a bakery, walk the Brooklyn Bridge
• all I want to do right now is curl up with my sweats and a glass of red wine and get lost in a book in front of a fireplace.
  

If You Were a Library Book, I'd Check You Out!

Holy, moly, me OH my!

I don't know what has gotten into the water, or the weather, or if the pages of GQ are coming to life or what....but there be some good looking men out and about in Brooklyn lately! Seriously, I'm almost wondering if an epidemic has struck.

I mean, sure, there are handsome people everywhere, everyday. But it seems that they have all gathered within a few miles of each other this past week. And I am NOT complaining. We all know how I have an attraction to Asian men. Well, let's define that, I like Asian but not "too Asian", they have to have that lil something extra about them. And they cannot be too short. Yesterday I hit the jackpot in that department when I was in Trader Joe's after work! I fell in love with 3 different Asian "McDreamy"s, one in the produce section, another in the pasta aisle, and the last standing in the check out line. It took all of my strength to resist going up to one of them and proposing marriage right there next to the Joe's Os!

Then today, on my way into work as I was walking down one of my favorite streets, again I spotted some ridiculously attractive guys. One was walking down from his apartment, and I swear everything went into slow motion. He was wearing the absolute, quintessential, always attractive, man outfit. Dark boots: check! Dark-nice-fitting-not-too-tight-slightly-rugged-jeans: check! A clean, white, cotton t-shirt: check! A dark, worn leather jacket, not too bulky, but just enough James Dean: check! Aviators: check! Great tousled hair, and slight stubble: check and check! I tried not to gawk at him. However that difficulty level jumped from manageable to impossible once he got on his MOTORCYCLE!! Sigh. And then he smiled at me, and I probably changed 4 different shades of red, because I was busted! He caught me completely eyeballing him. I'm sorry but what is a girl to do? He was straight pulling off that look like no one's business!

Also, I am a sucker for dogs. I notice them before I notice people. But one frisky dog noticed me first. I was standing on the corner, waiting to cross the street, trying to recover from watching the man of my dreams drive off on his motorcycle, when all the sudden I felt something wet and furry on my leg. And before I could investigate, the dog's nose went right up my dress! HEY! Watch it, you animal! He was bold, but he was also a big softy! His name was Earl and he was a happy golden retriever. I only know the name because his owner shouted it as he pulled him away and apologized. Then I saw that Earl had a pretty cute friend! He looked like a mix between a drummer, and carpenter. And all I could do was smile. A big, idiot, grin. Then, there was another dog. This time a french bull dog, and his equally french looking owner. "Hey, how are you today?" he said so sincerely as I walked past him and his dog, who was peeing-but we can forget that. "Great! How about you?" I said ever so casually. "Can't complain. It's lookin' up!" Ditto my friend, ditto! No complaints here. And then he said, "See you later." Oh boy. There is something very attractive about a guy with a dog, style, and an ease about him to strike up a conversation with a stranger.

I feel like I need to prepare myself for tomorrow. Get my game face on. And repeat to myself not to look like a complete turd if I do happen to run into, let's say...Mark Wahlberg.

That's The Way The Cookie Crumbles...

....or in my case this weekend, that's the way the Nutella Brownie crumbles!

Some times I even amaze myself with how I have gotten this far in life. The stupid, ridiculous, laughable, arguably unreal, irritating, and non-sensical things happen to me in abundance. I feel like Mr. Magoo, always one step ahead of the anvil dropping on me and being completely oblivious of it all. I imagine some look at me and think that the only thing going through my brain must be "ba-ba-badadum! manoma-na! ba-ba-badadum! manoma-na!" (Okay, and maybe, just maybe at times that might be the case.) This weekend was kinda heavy in the idiotic moments. However, I would like to make a defense in my case and say that it is not ALL my own doing.

Since moving to the craziness that is this city, I have become very unfamiliar with the, dare I say, "finer things in life". To do any task is complicated 10 times over in New York. Take for example doing the simple task of going to the grocery store. Hard. Have to walk however many blocks to get there, then you have to cram yourself through the tiny aisles, and try to decipher the un-organization. You also have to take into consideration, "if I buy this ice cream, will it melt by the time I get back home, it is 104 out today...." Then you have to triple bag everything (that is if you don't use reusable bags) and try to evenly disperse all the bags for your trek back home. Then you get to your door, and have to fumble for the keys, you open the door only to have it jammed with all the mail underneath, then you walk the 4 flights up to the sauna that is your apartment, and collapse on your kitchen floor, not longer having the energy or desire to cook. See? Hard. But somehow we choose to live here. I know, right?!? It amazes me too. And even sadder is after awhile you start to forget that there is an easier way. The memories of you pulling into a Kroger parking lot and taking your time in the store without 8 people breathing down your neck to get where you are, and pulling into your driveway and your brother coming out and getting the groceries....all that starts to get fuzzy. But this weekend, ah! this weekend. How I lived in the lap of luxury! (Did I even use that expression right? Wait...is that even an expression?)

My good ole pal Vaydre entrusted the well being of her beloved dog, and by extension, her amazing apartment into my care for the weekend. She must have a lot of faith:) Her place is NICE. It is so nice that I manage to make myself look like a complete fool numerous times over. Starting with I could not figure how to lock the door. No laughter, please. It turns out that it is one of those fancy doors that are always locked on the outside. 15 minutes later I found that out. Then, it has been almost 2 years since I have used a dishwasher, again it took a few trial and errors to get that machine up and running. Let's not even talk about the DVD player, I am still very upset by that! Do you remember the good ole day when you just put the TV on channel 3 and the DVD player would work? What happened? Why do you suddenly need to know algorithms to watch True Grit?

They also have the world's most comfortable mattress ever! The bad thing was that I have not realized just how bad my crappy little mattress that I have been attempting to sleep on these past months has been. Then I entered in this unbelievable, dream inducing, melt every stress away you have ever had-mattress and thought I could die! I had so much to do this weekend and I didn't accomplish half of it because I could not peel myself off that mattress. I felt drugged. Even my eyes were heavy with longing for the ultra soft cloud that is the best mattress ever! If I could, I would marry that thing! And I would be the happiest girl in the whole wide world! She fell in love with a mattress.....and lived happily ever after:0)

The building is so nice that they even have a doorman! This helped me realize that I have no doorman etiquette whatsoever! Are you supposed to make conversation every time you pass them? You know like "small talk", oh brother, I am awful at small talk...."hey....there....how's it going? So your a doorman huh? Do you like that job? Is it what you always wanted to be? So how bout them Mets?" It is painful. What worse is when you know they are trying not to laugh at you when you can't figure out how to open the fancy doors, and when both you and the dog get trapped in the scary revolving door and sheer and utter panic is all over your face. Or when you run into a chair in the lobby and fall over it, and make this super loud thud, and he just looks over his desk and says it disbelief "are you okay?!?" And you have to jump up and act like nothing is wrong and that you totally meant to check yourself on the chair and come crashing down everything in a 5 feet radius of you. Yep, totally meant to! Also, I felt like they were judging me. Because they know you are home. It's not like you could slip out the back door without their notice! Yes, I did sleep in that late sir. And yes, I did stay inside almost all day. What is it any of your business that I watched Wall Street 2 twice this morning, and ate almost half of the brownies I baked, and took a little nap on the equally comfortable couch? But instead when I finally did make my way out, I felt like I needed to explain myself. "I am working.....on a project....for the.......government...and it is super secret.....and requires me to seem lazy......but it is just a front......as I am a....secret agent, yea a secret agent.....so if you don't have any more questions, this secret agent needs to pick up another brownie mix!...for her super secret project..for the government!" Someone should write a book on how to interact with the doorman, and call it, The Guide To Opening Doors and People: How To Have An Un-Awkward Relationship With Your Doorman. I would read that, and make notes in the margin!

Next and finally, and this one amazed me too, I got locked out on their balcony. Well Riley (dog), Kia (friend), and I, stuck on the balcony. And here is the kicker, neither Kia or myself had a phone! What are the odds of that? I still have no idea how we got locked out! And NO ONE was on their balconies that we could call to help. We had to wait until someone was out front of the building and we started shouting. Well correction, Kia started shouting as I was too busy laughing. "HHHEEEYYYYY!!!! UP HERE! WE ARE LOCKED OUT! CAN YOU TELL THE DOORMAN!!!!" Then 15 minutes later and shouting back and forth to the doorman about not knowing what apartment number I was in, one of the maintenance people came in, shook his head, unlocked the door and walked out. I think even Riley was embarrassed. Poor pup! But the silver lining, I guess I can cross off Get Locked Out On a Roof/Balcony from my NY Bucket List!

I am back to my regular, complicated, overly stress, no frills life. Where sadly I have grown accustomed. It is so non exciting. I wanna life that Jay-Z would write a song about! HHHMmmmmmmm, the ideas are flowing.......

Strangers on a Train

Some times you have moments with people on the train. Whether you catch eyes with someone after something crazy, and yet funny just happened, and you both acknowledge it with a smile and a shake of your head. Or how certain people understand to give you more room so you can stand a safer distance away from the smelly passed out individual taking up 5 seats! Whatever it be, you have these little connections with people while riding the train.

The other day I had three. The first was on the morning commute when a very older gentlemen wearing those sunglasses suggesting either blindness or possibly eye surgery had just been performed, kept backing up into the lady standing behind him as if she didn't even exist. He had a backpack that stuck about 2 feet out from behind him, and a bunch of folders in his arms that suggest he be a lawyer of some sort and he was on his way to his little cramped, messy office where he has worked for the past 65 years. Either way he was slowly and hilariously scooting back farther and farther for no reason, over taking the little lady that was behind him, and partially me. I looked at her, she looked at me, and all we could do was laugh. There really was no point in saying anything, as he was most likely very hard of hearing, and what are you going to say, he looked as if a few breaths away from death.

The other was on my way to lower Manhattan. I was sitting across from one of the most attractive men I have ever seen! He was tall (but not too tall, as I am a shorty), he was dark (Asian-dark), and handsome. He had dark hair and dark eyes, and just enough slight imperfections in his facial features to make me swoon like a cartoon character! And, I must add, he was pulling that suit off like a GQ model. He just had this ease about him. I'm sure he saw me staring, I mean how could he not. He was sitting directly in front of me, and my head did not move once during the ride-wasn't even trying to hide my inquisitive eyes! I was doing all I could do not to drool. But the best part about him was that I highly doubt most other girls would go all ga-ga over him. Anyways, I got off the train feeling all dizzy and dumb.

Then on the way home, I had the ride with and annoying little kid, who's parents just thought he was the cutest, most intelligent, funny person. He was as loud as could be, standing all over the seats, trying to get as much attention from everyone as possible. His idiot parents were just beaming ear to ear, not doing anything to stop the little monster, probably thinking in their dumb little heads "look at our boy! quite the individual. he is SO independent! SO knowledgeable!" NEWS FLASH: He is an annoying 3 year old who just picked his nose and now has his hands all over the pole, spreading whatever kind of new strand of kid virus all over the place. How about you get you and your little "chosen one" off this train and take him home to enjoy. We don't want him. Anyways....what was I talking about? Oh, yea, so I caught eyes with the poor woman who was stuck next to the kid who looked like he was about to yell and cry all at the same time, so I threw her a sympathetic look, and then once available I moved over the seat so she could escape that awful creature!

So that's it! In one day I almost got sat on, fell in love, and almost hurt a little bratty kid. Wow, I. AM. EXHAUSTED!

PS-I heard U2's "With or Without You", Sting's "Every Breath You Take", and Alicia Keys "No One" multiple times in the past 4 days. How weird is that? What could it mean?

Summer In The City

It's starting to get warm. Summer is almost here. It takes a bit getting used to not having to put on socks, and boots, and scarves, and heavy coats. Now, you actually have to match your outfit because you won't have a heavy, long down jacket wrapped all around you. And your hair must be done because no more can you just throw on a hat. If only my limbs had a bit more of a tan then they do, I would be one happy camper.

There is something kinda amazing about this city this time of year. You can feel people's edges melting away. It's about to be summer, this is what you work towards all year round, and now it is here. People are taking it easy, chilling, relaxing now while they can, before it gets so unbelievably hot and all you want to do is crawl inside an AC unit. It was a busy time last night at the laundromat. They had every door and window open to get any type of a breeze circulating as the 20 some giant dryers, turned our clothes dry. They had a soothing mix of 80's/90's pop/rock classic ballads playing that I think everyone secretly wanted to burst out singing, but no one did. While we waited for our cycles to end we all sat around and watched Caso Cerrado. Then we claimed our tables and started the folding process. During which I had a thought about how strange it was that my under-roos were oddly close to the next folders shirt pile, and how his under-roos were so close to that ladies towel pile. And it made me laugh, we take all this time and energy in life, putting on clothing and taking precautions to not show our underwear to people, only for you to put it all on display at the laundromat so every Tom, Dick, and Harry can see them. But somehow, its not weird. After spending almost 2 hours there you start to feel a bond with your fellow washers. You feel like giving everyone a high-five upon leaving, feeling like you all just really accomplished something. We all left that night a bit shiny and dewy from a subtle sweat built up by a night of good, solid laundry doing, and the smell of Downy that followed us home.

Upon arriving home, you are greeted by the neighborhood UPS guy. He is always so nice, and everyone on the block knows, and loves him. What's not to love, he has gifts for you in his big brown truck, and he delivers them with a smile and a light hearted joke usually. As always you have to stop and pet Minnie, the little dog that lives 3 doors down, as well as saying hi to her owner. It's nice to come home and all the window are open and you can hear the city outside starting to slow down. With the house smelling like fresh laundry, I decided that tonight was the perfect night for tacos! I turned on my iTunes, which just so happened to play a perfect blend of Bob Marley, Eddie Vedder, Jack Johnson, Edith Piaf, and The Kinks that I could have sworn it grew a brain and knew just what I was in need of to set the mood just right on the perfectly warm May night. I decided to have my tacos and beer out on my fire escape. From up there I could see down into the rest of my neighbors backyards. Some were BBQ-ing, others were gardening, I could see some gathering around the TV about to start watching some prime time show, and one lucky duck who was passed out in his hammock. I decided to end this night by watching one of my surfing documentaries, so I could fall asleep dreaming of a life like that. But, not until I watched the final moments of a beautiful sunset over beloved Brooklyn:)

Reason #267 to Love New York

I had dinner and dessert the other night for a total of $3.50!

It was a shock to me as well! Like one of those times when you accidentally get 112 points on a turn of Words With Friends. But it did happen! And now that I know the secret recipe to a super cheap and delicious meal, I plan on doing the exact same thing time and time again. And, because I am nice, I'll share it with you lovely people as well!

#1-Get yourself a Metro card, and take the F train to Delancy St (The Lower East Side-you'll recognize it by the equal mix of hipsters to Asians)
#2-Walk to Vanessa's Dumplings House, on 118 Eldridge St. It is a little hot pot of deliciousness and they speak just enough English to get you by. (hehe, I just thought of Brian Reegan when he was like "I want HAM!, you bring me HAM now. I want to of the eating of HAM!")....Anyways....so this is my order: The original dumplings (pork and chive filled), you get 4, rather good size, for $1, and then I also got a sesame pancake which was $.75!
#3-For dessert, walk a few blocks over to Sugar Sweet Sunshine, 126 Rivington St. They have a good selection, there are the old standards (for those who enjoy the classics), and "outside of the box" ones like Pistachio, Strawberry (with REAL strawberries), Ooey Gooey (which is a whole lot of chocolate)...and so many more! Each cupcake is only...wait for it...$1.75, which in this city is a steal!

That was a good night! Not only was it all so delicious, but the feeling of pride knowing that you CAN have an inexpensive dinner experience, and amazing conversation (Whit) for all less than one Lincoln, (that's a $5 bill in case you don't know slang). And, BONUS we got free entertainment on the way...some guitar in the station...and on the way back, an older gentlemen doing ballet in the car, with no music! Everyone should experience the joys and craziness that is this city!