Catalogs and Calculations

Random- [ran-duhm] adjective: proceeding, made, or occurring without definite aim, reason, or pattern

List- [list] noun: a series of names or other items written or printed together in a meaningful grouping or sequence so as to constitute a record

Old vs New

• Old- Own bedroom with a door!
• New- Finally a big, comfy, much needed bed (Amanda like:))
  
• Old- The best shower head ever! I LOVE great water pressure
• New- Wi-fi. Meaning I can be anywhere in the house and be able to watch every episode of Toddlers and Tiaras that Netflix has to offer! (stop judging! I'm conducting a study on how psychotic parent's can be and this is part of my research!)
• Old- Never having to buy toilet paper or paper towel. (Roommate's got that Cosco card yo!)
• New- Right across the street from the park. Actually in my territory. Closer to just about everyone else.
  
• Old- Super close to work and Trader Joe's, and just about every train.
• New- Super cheap rent.
• Old- Skylight! And cable! Great neighbors!
• New- No time limit required!

Thought: is it add-ress? or ah-dress? Is my inner Midwest girl coming out?

Wishlist

• Start taking my vitamins again. As much as I hate to admit this, I sadly will not be forever young:( So I need to start tricking my body that it is and to hold on to our youth with the magic beans that are Chewable Flintstones vitamins!
• Read my magazines before the start of the month
• Get proper footwear for this coming winter in the city. Winter wet shoes. Winter dry shoes. Winter boots. Winter dress shoes. Winter dress boots.
  
• My dream job. (Please, please, please, please, plea......)
• Rediscover my inner domestic goodness. Get back in touch with my Nigella Lawson side. Have dinner parties!
  

I have just shy of 10 years left until I'm 30! Holy snikies! When did that happen???? Oh my goodness. I feel like I still have SO much I wanna do.....and now there is a time factor.....before I'm old and busted....and now I'm depressed.

Isabella: I love you so much. I hope you know that. Without you in my life I would have never known what it means to be an aunt to someone. To take care of someone, to look after them, and watch them grow. We kinda grew up together you and me. You came into my life when I was 14, and there is where you will forever stay no matter the distance between us. I hope for you to grow up a beautiful girl that focuses more on the inside then the exterior. Make opinions and feelings, and stick to your guns, be a little left of center-it's okay to be different (you will have a lot more fun that way) Don't forget the difference between right and wrong. I know some in your life will try to blur the lines between the two, but do what's right, no matter how hard that may be. Understand and apply what the words truth and honesty mean. Surround yourself with loving people who make you want to be a better person but who also stick to you during the ugly moments of life. Don't be afraid to be sad or scared or worried, or mad, but don't wallow in those emotions forever. Try everything in your power to be happy. Laugh (from deep down in your gut) every single day! Try to the best of your ability to find the good in people, and situations. Don't carry the weight of the world with you. Enjoy being a kid now, this is the only time you can be, and trust me, there will come a day when you will want to be 6 years old again SO BAD! I know things are a little rough right now, but keep that head up girl. Know that I think about you every day, and miss you like crazy. No matter what happens in life, know that you are genuinely loved by your family because you changed our world's forever. I never knew I could love someone I just met as much as I love you. Your my favorite ding-dong! And if you ever need to run away, you are ALWAYS welcomed to New York City to crash with your way cool aunt! I love you like I love farts baby doll! Here's to hoping to seeing you soon...

I Think We Should Go On a Break..

Let me just start out by saying that I love people. I really and truly do. I mean how big of a hypocrite would I be if I, a die hard Barbra Streisand fan, did not live by the mantra of "people who need people, are the luckiest people in the world!"?!?! That would be so very, very uncool of me to sing out those words, but not actually feel them. I want to do good ole Babs justice! Make her proud! People are the bread and butter of life! They make my world go round!

However, (ehem)......I think we need a break from each other. You know I love you, but lately I think our relationship has just turned toxic. More and more of you are becoming unbelievably rude and obnoxious, and so many different levels of annoying it makes my skin crawl. Whatever happened to common courtesy? Taking on more responsibility at work is not helping the situation. Having to talk to attorney after attorney, who are so high up their own butts it is any wonder they even know what fresh air smells like, really makes my day go so deep down into the pits I come out the other end looking and feeling like Eeyore. Listen up jerk wad! You are an idiot! We provide services for YOU, not the other way around. Tell me, is it really that difficult for you to tell me what address you are currently occupying? You don't even have to say that. All you need to say is Yes, or No to the address I just rambled off. You don't give out that type of info? REALLY?!?!?! How do your clients EVER find you, if you never tell anyone your address? You do realize I can just Google you right? What a genius you are to have passed the BAR but can't figured out how to use Google! You sir are a MORON! And I hereby delete you from our client list! Yea, that just happened! What are you gonna do about it? NOTHING, cause I won't give you my address! :P

Living in this city I think is adding to the pressure. I'm starting to feel it's not good to have so many people shoved and on top of each other in such a small square mile. My faith in humanity is very slowly seeping out of me with every backpack that touches me on the train, every person who suddenly stops short on the sidewalk, every person who shouts obscenities down my block at 3 am on a Tuesday night, and the countless rude things that come flying out of people's face flappers all the live long day! I just can't take it anymore. I barely had any patience to begin with, but all this extra crap is stretching that little bit, to it's absolute max! We are running on fumes here people! FUMES!

That is why I am suggesting a break. I know that I do love you, real deep down in my gut, or heart, or butt, or wherever. But right now, I just can't stand the sight of you. I know I want to spend forever with you. But right now, I need you as far away as possible. Just give me a little space to clear my head and to relearn all those reasons why I love you so much. So let's just leave it as a: I'll see you when I see you:)

Are You Strong Enough To Be My Man?*

*taken from the lyrics of Strong Enough by Sheryl Crow which I very heart fully would sing along with my mother while driving to Kroger when I was 12....and the words still apply today:)

Thank goodness for very attractive and assertive male actors. And for very talented and funny and endearing male writers. And for living proof, award winning husbands! You guys saved my life and brought me back to reality. Amanda almost made a BIG boo-boo. Word to the wise, boredom is like peyote to me: when it is in my system.....bad things happen. Now. we are not talking anything at a Hunter S. Thompson level. But I do act and think and probably look (emphasis on "probably" look, as it is mucho difficult for me to look anything less than exceptional!) very, very stupid. However, thanks to some real gentleman that have come on my radar I have been smacked into reality with a big sign that reads "Amanda, hold out for a REAL man, because believe it or not, they are still out there!" So I will no longer keep myself occupied with two bit losers who are the equivalent of white bread, and who cause more frustration in my life than anything else. Well, to you I say, "Good day, sir!" Be on your way. Keep walking, ain't need none of your kind around here.

Now because I am such a good friend, I will give you some of the things that helped me. First, enter Paul Newman. HELLOOOOO Paul Newman. What a man, what a man, what a mighty, mighty good man! Those piercing blue eyes and the air of confidence he has is crazy! His character Ben, in The Long, Hot Summer would have had me in love by the end of June! He knew he wanted Clara, and he was gonna have her. That's it! No ifs, ands, or buts about it! And talking about men, how about Robert Redford? Can I can a get a Hubble. He comes to her rescue, even when he doesn't have to. And he is not afraid to ruffle her feathers or to become genuinely irritated with her. And we can't even talk about men without bringing up the man of the hour: Ryan Gosling. He is a bona fided man! He has a legit personality, and it is consuming. Let's not even talk about how charming and handsome this man is (that is a whole post all on it's own.) But Lars gives the tiniest expression of caring and I go all weak in the knees!

I'm going to just put this out there: i love you Shane Nickerson! With each and every word that I read that you wrote makes my conviction to not get all wrapped up in a half man child that is seriously lacking in substance, that much stronger. Your Post about your kids are so sweet. You can tell that these little things are streaming out of you as if your heart melted, which mine does by the way, EVERY time!

And a big shout out to all the real life husbands that I know that are living like real men everyday! Kicking butt, getting things done. Still being able to maintain a sense of humor, quirky personalities, and handling your 'bidnas appropriately. (You've all scored some pretty amazing woman I might add as well. So kudos for that!) So, again, as a song somewhere, by someone once stated "I'm holding out for a hero!" Well, alright, maybe I should not be that diligent to not comply unless you wear stretchy pants, have a cape, and look totally different having glasses on, and can come to by rescue and whisk me away to the top of the Empire State Building.......but on the issue of being a manly man, and knowing what you want and knowing how to get it, and helping me get things down from the top shelf, or coming to my rescue with car trouble, or calming me down when I get all hyped up and crazy, and not being afraid to stand up to me, but still being gentle, on these things I WILL NOT budge! And I don't completely hate the idea of a cape......

In closing, thanks to all the real men out there that have proved to me not to settle. Thanks for doing you. And DOUBLE thanks for looking so good while you do it! Check you out! Go on with your bad self!

Love, Amanda Marie Kula (a REAL woman:))

'Til You Marry Me Bill

I. Am. In. Love.

Plain and simple. There is no escaping or denying it! I have found a person that makes my heart go boom-boom-boom. I suppose you want to know who my betrothed is? Well let's see. He is very creative, he had his own deign company that specialized in hats for a time. He attended Harvard. He has traveled the world. He knows just about every single socialite from Manhattan to Paris, but he could care less. He lives at Carnegie Hall. He is a photographer. His means of transportation is a bicycle. He wears the same blue vest just about everyday. And, he feels uncomfortable when a place is "too luxurious" for him. He is about 85 year old, and his name is Bill Cunningham. Yes, that Bill Cunningham.

Everyone already knows that there is a special little area of my heart that is like butter for super sweet, endearing, lovable older men. But Bill, he takes the cake! He might just be the absolute epitome of joy! And we all know how I could use more of that in my life! He loves capturing moments with his camera. And he is not fooled by copy cats. If he is not impressed, you will know. If he thinks you are fabulous, you will know. He does not care about the guest list before attending events. He will almost get hit by a cab so as to get the shot of the women in the amazing hat! And he will do this all with a big ole smile on his face. And he is unbelievably humble, he is not a sell out. In the movie Bill Cunningham New York you can see how he leads a simple life that is full of happiness. The best line ever was when he said that "I don't know how to work, all I know is how to have fun everyday!" In the movie when he was at Paris for Fashion Week, we see him just patiently waiting off to the side being completely overlooked until someone comes and pulls him in saying, and I quote, "the most important man in the universe" That is my love, the most important man in the universe! But I just loved how he wasn't all angry that he wasn't allowed in, and then NO ONE seemed to recognize him. Nope, not Bill. He just stood there and took what photos he could until he was allowed in. And bonus! He didn't have to sit at the end of the runway like all the other photogs. He got a front row seat baby! Talking right next to Anna Wintour. The best thing about him might be that he knows he is different than most other people, but he blissfully could not care less. Yep, that's my guy, the oddball, weirdo, who is having so much fun doing what he loves! Sorry ladies....he is mine!